Ray-Anne Carr

 What do we want the first 15 minutes of screen time, the first 1o mins of TV time, or I would suggest, first 3 pages of a novel to achieve?

* It has to establish the story world - contemporary, historical, futuristic. and therefor the tone of the story to follow

*It has to immediately signal the location - Interior -what kind of room? hospital bed, motel room, luxury palace? or Exterior - Time of day. Desert, Forest, City? Or both if the camera zooms in closer and closer. Sensual detail - soft fabrics. Harsh neon and fluorescent strip lights. Winter cold. Tropical jungle heat.

* The people. Who are they? What are they doing at that moment in time.

AND - why should we care? What is it about these people that we can relate to? Want to bond with? Engage with?What keeps us watching? Reading? What will lock us into their story?

To determine how the professionals go about achieving this, I have been taking a look at the opening of several recent crime dramas and evaluating aspects of the craft of creating an effective opening sequence.

Starting with a Tele Script. Bionic Woman.

Here in the UK we saw the Pilot Episode of ‘Bionic Woman’ 2008 style from NBC.

I thought it might be useful to record the episode and review the structure of the performance - particularly the opening section.  I understand from online forums that the final screened Pilot may be a slashed version of a 2 hr movie, but nevertheless, the professionals made a decision to go with this format and trust the audience.

The episode I saw had a total run time of 59 mins with commercial breaks at approx. 7, 26 and 46 minutes. 

So here goes. My personal brief synopsis of the opening section of Bionic Woman, with the UK commercial breaks shown.

Personal Conclusions?

* The first 2 minutes is a Teaser. Full of drama. Forces the viewer to ask lots of questions - where, who, why, what is going on? But it only lasts 2 mins.

* Why are they using a Teaser? Because the ordinary world of the lead is ..well, ordinary. She has an unlikely boyfriend who seems very sweet and she is kind to her teenage sister who was dumped on her by their father. She is a nice girl. And there is no drama in nice girls. So. The first commercial break comes in at 7 mins while folks are still prepared to hang on until something exciting happens.

* Do we care about the characters? What is the promise of the Teaser and the title of the pilot? Folk expect Jamie Summers to become the Bionic Woman. And that happens in Act Two. And suddenly we have some empathy with this character, and the situation she finds herself in. She has suffered serious loss. So, the viewer who came back after the break is rewarded with the drama. So yes, there is some emotional identification.

I don’t care about the boyfriend Will, despite his heroics. Or anybody else so far.

* Does it set the location and setting? Very well. Hard lab corridor, harder lighting, hard black armed team. Bloody bodies. This is not going to be a Jane Austen historical.

Overall. They had to use the dramatic opening section to fix the context of the drama and engage the viewer because the set-up of the ordinary world was too banal. 

The Jamie/sister conflict was used to maintain some tension, but this was a difficult one. The next 15 mins were packed with car crashes, classical medical emergency voices and operations. They had to create a normal world for Jamie before it was destroyed.

Problems? I did not believe that she was pregnant.  I did not believe that Will - if it was love at first sight - had not proposed before. And I did not believe that he would ask her to go to Paris with him. She is clearly intelligent, but has chosen a certain lifestyle at 24 - there is some secret backstory hinted at later which might have helped. I did not believe that Will would be giving lectures when he also had a job at the BioTech clinic.

Worse. I did not believe that this Jamie in the set-up was convincing as the empowered Jamie at the end. Even with chips in the brain - which curiously did not require the surgeons to ruffle her hair style.

For more info go here: http://www.tv.com/bionic-woman/pilot/episode/1057410/recap.html

Imagine if you will, that you are browsing the shelves of your big, brightly lit bookshop and come upon the Crime Section.  

Yes, a real life, physical, bricks and mortar, non-virtual bookshop.

There maybe 100s of books arranged alphabetically by Author Name, spines only, all calling for attention. Hardbacks, softbacks, Comic books. It is bewildering.

Except that, there, laid out before you, on the shelf or a display table, are the attractive front covers of perhaps five or ten - at most - latest hardbook books from well known writers whose work you have enjoyed before.

And perhaps one or two you do not know, but the cover design closely resembles another book you enjoyed. The title sounds interesting. The author’s name is not too scary. There is a quote from a writer you have heard of, telling you how good this story is.  Perhaps the bookshop recommends it.

Being a generous and brave person you pick up one of these new books. You might read the back blurb. You might even read the info on the inside covers. And if the marketing and design dept has done their work - you may flick to the first page of actual text and read the opening paragraphs.

One page. Maybe 3 or 4 paragraphs.  And you make your decision. Right then.

Because what are your options?

Are you truly willing to invest the next ?? hours of your life living in the world of this character and sharing this character’s experience? And this is about 500 pages, and no pictures. And you only read for maybe 30 mins in bed at night [ maybe 40 mins for women, 20 mins for men]. That could take weeks.

Or shall you go home and re-watch ‘Die Hard’ or the complete series of ‘24′ on DVD? You already know what sort of vicarious experience that will give you, and you do not have to pay out your hard earned cash for something you may NOT like or enjoy.

Or wait until the paperback comes out and take it on vacation with you? If you remember then, because of course, there will be 50 other books out between now and then.

Do you take the risk?

 THE BAD NEWS?

I believe that the same dilemma faces any writer who is looking for an audience, for their work, irrespective of whether they are -

* the literary or creative artist Agents, Publishers and Producers, Script Readers

* A fiction reader of any genre

* A TV audience with a remote control who is ‘channel hopping’, perhaps at the program changes on the hour or half hour

* A movie goer who is scanning Trailers trying to decide which film to watch for themselves, their date or their family.

THE GOOD NEWS?

I also believe that the professional writer can create the best opportunity possible for their work to stand above the others, to be seen, read, heard. To have an audience. To get past the gatekeepers who they need to love their work.

By working until their fingers bleed and their brain explodes [ at least in my case]

Learning the craft.

It is in our own hands to find the best way we can to bring the audience to our work.

And this is good news. Because it means that it is in our own power.

THIS WEEK. I am trying to re-write the opening pages of my latest WIP in the most compelling way possible.

And on the way I am going to share what I learn from resources on Fiction Hooks, TV Teasers, Movie Trailers and Script First Pages.

Courage ma brave, courage.